Final precepts, daily conduct · Verse 34 of 37
Verse 34: Abandon harsh words
Verse 34 of The Thirty-Seven Practices of Bodhisattvas, the fourteenth-century Tibetan poem by Gyalse Tokme Zangpo (1295–1369). It belongs to the section on final precepts, daily conduct.
Harsh words disturb others' minds and corrupt your bodhisattva conduct. Therefore, abandon harsh speech, which is unpleasant to others. This is the way of a bodhisattva.
The practice of all the bodhisattvas is to avoid harsh words,
Which others might find unpleasant or distasteful,
Since abusive language upsets the minds of others,
And thereby undermines a bodhisattva's conduct.
Abusive language upsets others
And undermines the ethics of a bodhisattva.
So, don't upset people or
Speak abusively — this is the practice of a bodhisattva.
A facilitator's reading across the commentaries
AB's distinction (forceful ≠ harsh; intention is the criterion) prevents the misreading that bodhisattvas can never speak strongly. Nagarjuna's honey/flowers/excrement typology (via KS) is instantly memorable group material.
GR Garchen Rinpoche · HHDL H.H. the Dalai Lama · AB Dr. Alexander Berzin · KTGR Khenpo Tsultrim Gyamtso Rinpoche · KS Khenpo Sodargye · TC Ven. Thubten Chodron · KM Ken McLeod
What the teachers say
Garchen Rinpoche Drikung Kagyu
The two-sentences-to-a-patient contrast: "hurry up, take your medicine" versus gently saying it will help — same intention, opposite effect. Right motivation needs right method; never speak while angry — "while you are angry you must think the other person is my parent."
Full commentary: 37practices.info (37practices.info serves this as one long page; find the verse by number.)
H.H. the Dalai Lama Gelug
(Brief.) "If one gets into the habit of using harsh speech it is difficult to stop" — the quick-tempered must watch themselves; strike delusion down the moment it arises.
Full commentary: 37practices.info (37practices.info serves this as one long page; find the verse by number.)
Dr. Alexander Berzin Gelug
Separates malicious intent from forcefulness: shouting to stop a child running into traffic is fine; his own teacher Serkong Rinpoche called him "Idiot" — forceful correction from genuine compassion. What's prohibited is speech aimed at hurting.
Full commentary: studybuddhism.com
Khenpo Tsultrim Gyamtso Rinpoche Karma Kagyu
(Brief, practical.) Recall the occasions your sharp words caused tears; harsh speech impairs bodhisattva conduct through the very medium of communication — gentle speech guards both parties.
Full commentary: dharmaebooks.org (Free ebook, trans. Suzanne Schefczyk.)
Khenpo Sodargye Nyingma, Larung Gar
Citing Mipham: friendships and conflicts are caused mainly by speech — "most of the wars that devastate the world are started by harsh words." Nagarjuna's typology: words like honey (helpful), like flowers (honest and true), like excrement (violent, false) — discard the third. Gentle speech is itself merit, "the seed of achieving enlightenment."
Full commentary: khenposodargye.org (Free ebook PDF.)
Ven. Thubten Chodron Sravasti Abbey, Gelug
Winter Retreat vv29–37 talk.
Full commentary: thubtenchodron.org
Ken McLeod Shambhala / independent
Talk 11: harsh speech reinforces one's own confusion while harming others. Tricycle v34 (video/subscriber).
Full commentary: unfetteredmind.org (Tricycle's per-verse written commentary is behind a subscriber paywall.)
Further reading: Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche, The Heart of Compassion (Shambhala). A purchased book — no text is reproduced here.